Saturday, 25 July 2009

President Barack Obama Invites Sgt. James Crowley And Henry Louis Gates Jr. To The White House For A Beer. . .

I take note of the fact that some wags have suggested that President Barack Obama engaged in some racial profiling of his own by inviting an Irish American cop to have a beer with him and his good friend Henry Louis Gates Jr. at the White House. I can't help but wonder if Gates will continue to cry wolf in his beer. . . Personally I think that some enterprising brewer should buy the rights to the arrest photo that shows Henry Louis Gates Jr. yelling like a maniac and use it to advertise their product.

Let's see now. What might some of the advertising slogans be. . .

Amstel Beer: Cause strife. Pure Unfiltered.

Bass Ale: Reach for Notoriety.

Bavaria: And now, for a tantrum.

Bud Light: Be yourself and make it a sad sight.

Budweiser: Where there's strife, there's Gates.

Busch Beer: Head for the porch.

Carlsberg: Gates. Probably the best boor from Harvard.

Coors Light: The Boldest Lambasting Boor In Cambridge.

Corona: Miles Away From Ornery?

Dos Equis Mexican beer: Sooner or later you'll regret it.

Guinness Irish Stout: Politeness is good for you.

Bad things come to those who bait.

Harp Irish Lager: Who puts out the fire?

Heineken: A bitter boor deserves a beer with Obama.

Miller: Everything you always wanted in a boor. And more.

If you've got the crime, we've got the boor.

Labatt Blue: A whole lot can happen, Out of the Blue.*

Another Labatt Blue slogan is/was -

If I wanted water, I would have asked for water.

which "translates" to -

If I wanted Crowley, I would have asked for Crowley.

Michelob Ultra: Lose the barbs. Not the face. . .

Michelob AmberBock: Rich and _______ (fill in the blank yourself)

St. Pauli Girl: Put him on a pedestal, or in an Ivory Tower

or You never forget your worst nightmare.

Schaefer: America's Boldest Harvard Boor.

Sagres: Spot the differences

Samuel Adams: Harvard's World Class Boor.

The original beer advertising slogans may be found here.

*No need to tweak the actual Labatt Blue advertising slogan at all but I like -

A "rogue cop" can happen, Out of the Blue. . .

even though I don't believe that Sgt. James Crowley is really a rogue cop.

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